Potty Time

So we have been toying with the whole potty training deal, encouraging, but not pushing or forcing the potty issue as to not scar Matthew for life and turn him into a deranged serial killer. These How to raise your child type books are pretty harsh. I mean it. If your child turns out crazy, they make no bones about it totally being because you did not give him that damn balloon or take him to Arby's once.

Anyway, he has sporadically gone on the potty, will sit for long amounts of time, then get up and pee or poop in his diaper. Quite frustrating.

So out new daycare tells us that they have a fool proof potty training method, they have adopted this method after consulting with a child psychologist and once the child shows the "right" amount of interest in the potty, he will be placed on "potty patrol" and will be trained within 10 easy days.

This sounds GREAT!!!

So, I get a letter home in Matthew's packet informing me that Matthew has shown interest in the potty and is now ready. (The interest by the way was harassing his friend Dylan while Dylan was pottying and trying to pull Dylan off of the potty to keep playing). Again, I digress.

So in this letter, it tells me specifically what I will need to bring to school for this program. The items needed are as follows:
3 shirts
3 pairs of pants
5 pairs of socks
10 pairs of underwear, and
1 extra pair of shoes.

It became very evident that the child psychologist formulated potty patrol plan is to let the child pee and poop all over the place until he decides to use the potty.

I asked the teacher if that was about right and she shrugged and said "well, I guess that's one way to put it". At least it's there and not here.

Tonight before bedtime I found myself sitting on the edge of the bathtub singing songs about "poop goes in the potty" and "like to poop poop poop ... in the potty".

I need wine.